A LITTLE SOLDIER...MADE OF SAND...

It is in our culture to learn to fight, we refer to children who have difficulties as: 'little soldier' and we praise them for being strong and facing abusive reality and accepting it (as injustice for example).
When I have heard this way of saying for the first time I shivered inside.

A child behaving like a little soldier? A child who has learned to loose his vulnerability, who has built a facade and pretend everything is all right when inside he is crumbling? I felt so much pity for that little child.

We have been told to be strong, not to cry and face reality. We have been told that when we give up and we surrender we are losers, we have learned to fight and to win at all costs, our integrity included.

I am not saying that perseverance is a 'bad quality' I think perseverance is the only tool we have to reach our full potential as human beings, to move forward toward the unknown.

Spiritual growth is painful, it is the most painful journey of humankind but after the pain there is a bliss and a joy that it is indescribable and we will never feel that pain again. Once we are honest, feel our feelings (grief, sadness, etc) and take action we became free, free from the pain and free from those situations that cause the pain (we will not have those in our life anymore because we do not need them for our spiritual growth - we have moved forward).

If I did not have perseverance I would be the most lazy person in the world. I did not have any perseverance when I was young, I was giving up everything as a consequence of my self-defeating behaviours which are a consequence of wanting to control. It feels easier (and less painful) to control the outcome - and be little soldiers - (even if is not what we want) than accepting defeat. |It is very painful, extremely painful.

The pain of control never ends whilst the the pain of feeling our feelings and taking responsibility for our feelings is temporary.

I use my perseverance to shape my spiritual form, I use perseverance in wanting to feel my feelings and discovering who I am, in surrendering and feeling the terror of letting go control over places, people and things.

Surrender is the most courageous act we can take and it brings peace and bliss.

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