I have heard about two persons (one of them I did not know personally, he was the brother of a good friend) that committed suicide in the last couple of months. James and Brian. They both hung themselves. One in a closet, the other on tree in his garden. I think they had at least one thing in common: they had lost hope. Hope that their emotional pain would stop. Hope in the beauty of life. Hope that someone would understand their pain. Hope for a change. Hope for serenity. I have been there too, long ago. When you are in dilemma, when the pain to stay or the pain to go are both unbearable and you think the only way out is to die, you are wrong, there is a solution. That place is a terrible place to be because when you feel that way, you have a compulsion to act. It is stronger than you. If you act it is just a moment and then you'll change your mind. A moment you will regret if you go ahead with it and you'll survive. Sometimes the physical consequences will be with you fore
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